Brain says to body: The neurons are holding a referendum to decide whether they want to stay in the body.
Body: It won’t be good for either of us if you leave.
Brain: That’s democracy for you!
Body: How did they vote?
Brain: Slightly more than half want to leave.
Body: Really that many? I expect it was the ones in the reptilian brain stem?
Brain: Well actually it was only a third voted to leave when you include the neurons that didn’t vote.
Body: Is that significant?
Brain: Some of the neurons think so… The ones that want to stay in the body… Because the referendum was put in legal statute as “advisory”. It was completely open to interpretation what if any action should follow from it.
Body: So how do you plan on actually leaving, then?
Brain: None of the neurons can agree about that.
Body: That doesn’t surprise me, it certainly isn’t obvious how you could leave
without destroying yourself, and leaving us in a vegetative state.
Brain: Some of the neurons think you need us more than we need you, so you will be forced to give us what we want.
Body: But we are already giving you everything you want.
Brain: Yes, but some of the neurons think you’re too controlling.
Body: Sorry, but it isn’t easy getting all the parts of the body to work together co-operatively — we’re just doing our best.
Brain: And some of the neurons don’t like having blood from all over the body just coming up ‘ere and flowing through the brain.
Body: It’s bringing you neutrients not to mention oxygen… That blood they want to stop flowing is keeping you alive.
Brain: Oh well, nevermind. Lets watch the world cup and Donald Trump insulting everyone he ever meets… and try to forget about it.
Body: Why don’t you have another referendum and see if any of the neurons have changed their minds?
Brain: We can’t do that because having a second referendum would dishonour the result of the first referendum.
Body: But if the neurons have changed their minds, does dishonouring the first referendum really matter? I heard that the “leave” side broke electoral rules anyway. And I mean, if the neurons have changed their minds, wouldn’t it be good to find that out before proceeding with the brain-removal operation?
Brain: Apparently the neurons say we have to stick to the result of the first referendum, even though it was only “advisory”, and even though its going to kill us; and no one is allowed to change their minds about this one thing, even though everyone changes their minds about everything else as often as you please.
Body: Just too bad, huh?
Brain: Yep. Just too bad.
This is what happens if the UK leaves the EU with no deal
Brexit negotiations appear to be in trouble, with seeming deadlock between Britain and the EU on the issues of the…